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"We don't have none of this stuff in the boys' bathroom! Wait a minute! We don't got none of this... we don't got doors on the stalls in the boys' room, we don't have, what is this? What's this? We don't have a candy machine in the boys' room!" -Duckie, Pretty in Pink

"Panama, where it's always isthmus and never winter." -My sister

"Readers browsing through our own anthology will see that the zoology attributable to dreams is in fact considerably more modest than that attributable to God." -Jorge Luis Borges, The Book of Imaginary Beings

"You know, I'm in the only one in this family who has no problems. And you know why? Because every time I'm feeling blue, or puzzled, what I do, I just invite a few people to come visit me in the bathroom, and-- well, we iron things out together, that's all." -Zooey, Franny & Zooey

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"The smaller German kind of deer." -a random note written on a piece of paper on my desk
Friday, January 6, 2006 @ 02:16 p.m.

I like the phrase "the intervening years," because it makes it sound like passing time has some kind of structure. I'm npt sure if I believe that, but it's a comforting thought, isn't it? I mean, intervening between what and what? time and time.

I go back to class on Monday. I'm torn between being happy, that my boredom is going to be alleviated, and being troubled by the knowledge of the incipient work. (I also like the word incipient. my thesaurus says: "developing, growing, emerging, emergent, dawning, just beginning, inceptive, initial, inchoate; nascent, embryonic, fledgling, in its infancy, germinal." I also like inchoate, so there's a double source of joy for me.) Anyway, I'm never really content with what I'm doing. I always want to be more busy, less busy, more challenged, less stressed, more appreciated, less expected-to-be-responsible-for. So I may as well accomplish things. Besides, I have several hundred textbook-budget-dollars left unspent, and if they are still unspent a week from now I am going to buy some new shoes. So that's something.

We went to see Brokeback Mountain yesterday (we got free passes, because I get free everything at my job which is awesome) and I liked it a lot. It was quite a sad movie though, and by the end I can only compare the cinematic experience to being punched in the stomach. ("that's a metaphor. But that really happened.") I mean, it's not an experience that you would really want to put yourself through more than once or maybe twice.

My dad has these funny ideas about my sister and I, that we're in love with all these male movie stars. The spectre of Johnny Depp gets invoked quite a bit at family dinners, as an adored man, but really my dad is the only one who ever brings him up. Heath Ledger is another one. My dad is CONVINCED that all the women he knows are in love with Heath Ledger. And so my dad imagines (and claims) that I like to watch A Knight's Tale JUST so I can hear Heath Ledger say, "Jocelynnnnnnn!" The idea that this doesn't excite me is incomprehensible to him. Even though he says it with a funny accent, and he's really talking to someone else.

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Tuesday, January 3, 2006 @ 06:34 p.m.

Julia: You know, if I were a golfer, I think I'd prefer to play at night.
Rory: I think that'd be hard. You'd tee off and then probably... just wander. You'd never know if you were anywhere near the green.
Julia: I'd have a lot of faith in myself.
-Stewart Lemoine, Shocker's Delight!

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X vs. Y
Sunday, January 1, 2006 @ 09:40 p.m.

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Gorilla
The Family Stone
Has fleas. Has Dermot Mulroney.
Is afraid of water (according to my #1 gorilla source, the book Congo) Is afraid of thwarting, challenging or even avoiding cliches.
Stinks. Stinks.
Can make you cry (by crushing your ribcage) Made the woman in the tacky red vinyl coat sitting next to us cry
Has a menacing stare and (according to the children's encyclopedia) opposable thumbs. Has people falling in love with their fiances' siblings (not once but twice) and Diane Keaton dying of cancer

Advantage: gorilla.

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Neil Postman's Amusing Ourselves to Death
Tuesday, December 27, 2005 @ 09:51 a.m.

What Orwell feared were those who would ban books. What Huxley feared was that there would be no reason to ban books, for there would be no one who wanted to read one. Orwell feared those who would deprive us of information. Huxley feared those who would give us so much that we would be reduced to passivity and egoism. Orwell feared that the truth would be concealed from us. Huxley feared that the truth would be drowned in a sea of irrelevance. (vii)

It's hard to believe that Postman wrote this in the early 1980s, it seems so prescient. Every time I read a Neil Postman book I flip out a little bit. (Is it possible to flip out "a little bit"?) Because the world is always ending, in some way or other, and yet life goes on.

James gave me a really splendid thesaurus for Christmas and I have been looking things up in it quite a bit. For prescient it says: prophetic, predictive, visionary, psychic, clairvoyant, farsighted, prognostic, divinatory, insightful, intuitive, perceptive, percipient. I think prescient is actually the best, but in a slightly different context I might be able to make use of one or more of the others. And that is a good feeling.

I learned to knit hats this year. I have already made one for myself, my sister, and James. If anyone else wants one, let me know. I would be happy to knit one for you, even if I don't know you. I want to knit hats for the whole world. All of humanity should be cute-- that's my Christmas wish.

Christmas was nice. We had a good time playing in my sister's new tent. Also, there was a rather hilarious series of jokes based on the word "isthmus" ("isthmus miracle," "isthmus present") and culminating in Kristen commenting, "Panama, where it's always isthmus and never winter." I'm still finding it funny as I type it. Also I invented an organization of Portuguese and Spanish information professionals who oppose IFLA (the International Federation of Library Associations and Institutions) called "the Contrarian Iberian Librarians' Association." When puns are made at breakfast, you know it's a good holiday.

I plan to spend the coming week sitting in a castle of books, ones I've gotten from various sources and not gotten around to reading.

"We complete the adventure... but another member of our crew has been lost. This one was my son-- also our equity partner. We start the voyage home in our wounded vessel."
-The Life Aquatic

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Monday, December 26, 2005 @ 06:22 p.m.

christmas 009
My sister got a tent for Christmas. We set it up in the basement, and then we sat in it and watched TV. It's a two-person tent, but if you are just watching TV you can fit more. (I knitted my sister a hat like Jayne from Firefly, and she wore it all day. It was cute.)

christmas 008
I refuse to accept that anyone might be tired of pictures of my dog.

christmas 004
This isn't from Christmas, I just thought it was pretty.

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Monday, December 19, 2005 @ 12:29 p.m.

"We do not know what the dragon means, just as we do not know the meaning of the universe, but there is something in the image of the dragon that is congenial to man's imagination, and thus the dragon arises in many different latitudes and ages. It is, you might say, a necessary monster, not some ephemeral and casual creature like the chimera or the catoblepas."
-Jorge Luis Borges, The Book of Imaginary Beings, xii

"Well, he can't break my heart... because he kind of makes me sick." -Selma, Simpsons

I rented The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. I told the guy at the video store, "No one else will watch this with me. So I am watching it by myself." and he was like, "No one? Not even other women?" I thought it was great. I liked it even more than Josie and the Pussycats. I cried throughout pretty much the entire movie. A good movie adaptation should help you remember the things you loved about a book, and live them over again.

James and I also went to see Peter Jackson's King Kong, and I thought it was terrible. I was really disappointed. It was a weird, self-indulgent, overly long, retro pastiche. I said to James, "I didn't think it was possible for a movie with so much action to be so boring." At various points, when the people behind us were crying at the heartbreak of Naomi Watts and monkey, I was trying to keep from laughing. So there you go. Thinking of going to see King Kong? Rent The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants instead. It'll be cheaper and better. And girls will like you.

I bought something for my own stocking, which may seem whimsical or ridiculous depending on your standpoint. But as Meghan sagely pointed out, "you'll probably forget about it anyway."

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Sleeping for 300 years
Wednesday, December 7, 2005 @ 11:17 a.m.

I walked home from school today (it's -17 degrees) but I forgot the unsung heroes of the winter outfit: socks. I was wearing socks, but just sucky little ones. And so I realized that socks are like scarves for your ankles. And then I liked the sound of that, so I think I might write a little poem about it.

Oh, socks are like scarves for your ankles/Without them, you'll find, the cold rankles./If you have an adventure outside,/bring good socks along for the ride./I'm not kidding.

Tee hee. rankles.

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reasons why rock music is a bad influence in children
Tuesday, December 6, 2005 @ 03:40 p.m.

  • It glorifies promiscuous sex, drug use, bad hair, and motocycles
  • it fails to address the types of serious concerns that country music does (bankruptcy, adultery, various mechanical failures related to trucks)

I'm sorry it's been so long. Not really sorry for you, because I'm doubting there's anyone reading this who cares very much one way or t'other; but sorry because my failure to update this page is just one of many symptoms characterizing my life lately. failure to do dishes promptly! failure to sleep! failure to have any money! failure to do anything but work. there are the times (as the kingston trio* famously said) that try men's souls.

* or it may have been the lettermen.

Anyway, I am coming up for air. I wrote my final exam today, and I have one more paper to write and hand in before next Monday, and then my first grad school semester will be finished. It's not that it's been particularly difficult in cognitive terms, like I need to sit in bed for half an hour every night trying to wrap my brain around the concepts. It's just the sheer amount of work. I got through my undergrad degree sort of on my wits and intellectual charms, but that's not getting me anywhere anymore. I actually have to work. It's for chumps, guys. I'm just letting you know.

I have this weird cable channel, which has the abbreviation "TCM." Does anyone know what this is? It's channel, like, 49. It is the single weirdest channel in the world. It's great because every time I flip past it there is something random on. A sampling: an old Western which I took a few minutes to analyze from a feminist perspective - a documentary about MGM musicals which featured the strangest dance routines I have seen in my life - a movie with Katharine Hepburn that I could not identify - a blonde in one of those little fur bed-jackets attempting to seduce the family doctor by reading a big thick book - something from the end of the "thin man" franchise. It's like TV cocaine. It reminds me of those weird anthologized videos Amelie made, except all on one channel. Ah, good ole TCM. Now that I am done classes (almost) I am going to be watching you a lot more. [file under: pop culture adventures]

I have also played about a million freecell games. But I cannot get my statistics above 72% no matter how hard I try. (However, this is still good. I have my own computer now. When I used to live at home my mom would, and I am not making this up, come downstairs at night and lose Freecell games on purpose just to mess with me.)

I'm more excited about CHristmas this year than usual, I'm not sure why. I'm also less excited about my birthday. Weird, huh? Maybe 23 is the first birthday when you're officially old and don't care anymore. I realize 23 isn't that old, but it feels that way today. This type of winter can make anyone feel old. It's so cold it feels like it is crunching your lungs. As an experiment, I am trying to trick myself into thinking that I enjoy feelings I really don't, namely being cold and being hungry. I'm trying to see how I've been constructed by discourses. Actually, I have no idea what I'm talking about.

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things i have done in the past 6 hours to avoid working on a paper
Monday, November 21, 2005 @ 08:31 p.m.

  • All my dishes
  • watched Angel
  • Checked my email about 6 times
  • Checked the status of my Air Miles account (I have 14 air miles. 14!)
  • Made a cheap-ass lasagna with sauce made of campbell's soup

But eventually I must face my destiny.

It's the end of term (almost) and I've been having nightmares related to academic failure. That's how you know things are coming to a conclusion. But it's getting to be the time of year when I get invited to Christmas events, and that's always funs. Plus this year James is staying in Edmonton and having Christmas with my family (such as it is, because we're not big with the traditions), and that's exciting. My mom and sister are even making him a stocking. He is essentially part of the family. He obtained that status by mocking me with impunity, though, so don't get a nice warm feeling about it.

On a related Christmas note I am determined to finish all my Christmas shopping this year without setting foot in a mall. Big box stores in empty parking lots are OK, but you have to walk from one store to another OUTSIDE. Otherwise it's a mall, and my life is forfeit. I'm thinking of making a CD of Christmas (and winter) songs that I like, for playing at work. We generally listen to the Boney M Christmas album for hours, but that gets old faster than you might think. Anybody know any nice Christmas/winter songs? So far I have the TOri Amos version of "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas," and Joni Mitchell's "River." Songs that bring me to tears (like that one) are worth extra points. But if that challenge sounds daunting, keep in mind that I recently cried at the end of this book. I'm very on edge. So it's EASY.

We went to see WALK THE LINE, that movie about Johnny Cash, and I really liked it. But if there's one thing I learned from watching it, it's that Elvis was a drug pusher and Jerry Lee Lewis was an asshole. Now THAT's history filmmaking. Fucking Elvis. He's always ruining everybody's lives!

On my mind: The weather has been unseasonably warm. We are close to the warmest November on record here, so far being beaten only by 1917 or some such thing. While I was waiting for the bus, a silent guy gave me a creepy little religious comic book about hell that made me kind of depressed. I was in Toronto last weekend, and that was weird. I went to my old school and it had been torn down. Is it too much to ask that when we leave a place or person behind, it stay exactly as we left it, forever?

I take cold comfort in the fact that the past eventually becomes so insignificant that no matter how much it hurt at the time, it will be possible to forget it. We're forgetting machines. I wandered down these streets in this city that ruined my family's life (or so it seemed at the time), and I was struck momentarily by the idea: I bet I would like living here. As if I were a stranger. I never would have had the chance to feel that way if I hadn't gone back. So that's good, I guess. I knew everything would feel smaller, and I craved that. Although the past can never be small enough, or insignificant enough, for me.

I'm obsessed with remembering some things and forgetting others.

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new photos
Wednesday, November 9, 2005 @ 10:05 p.m.

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first snow, 2005.

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my new librarian action figure with shushing action.

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the meta-pumpkin James and I carved.

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vista fabulosa.

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an arty picture James took that is actually of my TV.

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TOBY!

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free of evil (ceiling) demon doubt
Sunday, November 6, 2005 @ 03:59 p.m.

FREAKING OUT!

OK, I feel slightly better, but not very much. I am going out of town next weekend and I have 5 thousand things to hand in first. and I am not exaggerating. Well, OK, clearly I am. But not by much.

BOOKS ARE WEAPONS-- in a free democracy everyone may read what he likes. Books educate, inform, inspire; they also provide entertainment, bolster morale. This book has been manufactured in conformity with wartime restrictions--read it and pass it on. Our armed forces especially need books.
-message that appeared on the cover of Dell War paperbacks during WWII. (According to an interesting article in the UTNE reader)

I have a complete draft of my term paper on digital copyright and libraries. I got to use the word "draconian." so i guess in that sense it was a good day. I never have an opinion about any of these things, until I do a bit of reading, and then suddenly I'm so opinionated. I get upset easily, and I think I might also be very susceptible to well-written arguments. For example, I read Lawrence Lessig's The Future of Ideas, and suddenly I was thinking in all-caps. WHY ARE WE SACRIFICING THE COMMON GOOD TO SATISFY THE GREED OF MEDIA CONGLOMERATES WHO DO NOT UNDERSTAND THE NATURE OF THE INTERNET? Like that. Attractive.

essentially I think I am a lazy radical. I can't really be bothered to pursue political opinions on my own, but if I come across good ones that belong to other people, I will adopt them and violently espouse them. Go ahead, try me! Convince me of something crazy! I'll probably agree with you.

[Not that Lawrence Lessig is crazy, I don't mean to imply that. He seems like an intelligent and reasonable man whose reputation will be tarnished by the fact that I'm on his team. although not really tarnished, because honestly, on the scale of Things that People Are Paying Attention To, I rate much lower than he does. i just thought i should clarify that for legal reasons.]

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amusing searches in recent website tracker memory:
Wednesday, November 2, 2005 @ 04:23 p.m.

  • good vs evil zippo lighter
  • R RATED PICTURES OF SICK HORRIBLE GROSS THINGS
  • nice to look at websites

ALl of which lead equally here.

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This meeting of Gay Witches for Abortion will now come to order.
Wednesday, October 26, 2005 @ 12:55 p.m.

Phil [from the Amazing Race]: Did you know that in Panama, it's illegal to wear underpants on top of underpants on top of your pants?
[pause]
Meghan: Phil made a funny!

It has come to my attention through my computers class that I have been misusing the paragraph tag in HTML for approximately 7 or 8 years. I guess that's what I get for learning by reading other people's source code. From now on, it's all going to be kosher! Only <P>'s and </P>'s from here on out. that's our guarantee.

Still no consistent use of capital letters though. That would be giving in to the man.

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Tuesday, October 25, 2005 @ 12:11 p.m.

as my project for the day, i am going to accuse random things of being "the end of privacy."

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recent concerns and developments
Monday, October 24, 2005 @ 04:30 p.m.

  • I have one of those plug-in air freshners in my kitchen. What would you say are the chances it's suffusing my clean dishes with delicious-scented toxins?
  • I'm testing my theory that the one food I could eat continually, for the rest of my life, without ever getting tired of it is Breton crackers with spinach and feta cream cheese. so. good.
  • I helped Meghan move into her new condo yesterday and I have only this to say: it's time for all my friends to marry, have 2.1 kids (immediately if possible-- adoption?), buy split-levels in the suburbs, and start accumulating stuff like crazy. That's the only way to ensure I don't have to move all their heavy stuff around once a year forever. I don't mean Meghan specifically here; I mean everyone.
  • However we did use a U-haul rented dolly to move a box spring around a torturously corner-y hallway. it was hilariously inefficient. I drew a little picture in my journal.

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waiting for anything
Thursday, October 20, 2005 @ 02:45 p.m.

I am thrilled that george w. bush has been googlebombed to the extent that when you type in "failure" to google and hit "I'm Feeling Lucky," you get the whitehouse page. imagine what the internet could do if it just put its mind to it.

also you can get a dublin core viewer extension for firefox! i am SO THERE! Soon i will see metadata everywhere.

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P.S.
Wednesday, October 19, 2005 @ 02:22 p.m.

Internet: I hate you for being so purple. I hate myself for driving you to it.

Also I am pleased to announce that this site now complies with dublin core metadata standards. why you ask? well, I am in library school, and so I have to practice various metadata activities. and secondly, i like to say "dublin core." dublincoredublincoredublincore. see what i mean? it's my favourite metadata standards project because its name sounds like an action movie. Disaster in the Dublin Core!

Possible geeky library projects being considered for future development: a site search feature, specific id #s that identify individual posts (because at present I have a serious cataloguable units problem), subject headings. thoughts?

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everything starts falling to pieces.
Wednesday, October 19, 2005 @ 10:21 a.m.

hi internet.

that other page was getting kind of long huh?

this one is better.

now that i have cable, all i do is watch TV. it's so stupid. last night i watched this reality show about the two remaining members of TLC (T and C) selecting a new third member for their band. [cleverly entitled R U the girl?] and i could literally (well, ok metaphorically) feel my brain cells leaking out through my ears. i can't join mensa anymore. muchmusic has spoiled me for the world.

you know, library school is also in the process of spoiling me for the world. i never used to want to apply library of congress subject headings to everything. i'm becoming even more nerdy than i was before. i should have entered a cooler grad program, such as an MA (in being a rockstar) or MSC (in the science of cool). or archiving.

tee hee. just kidding. archiving isn't cool! i can't believe you almost believed me!

i love you all so much,
jocelyn

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